If you're like me you're a little sick of all the flip-flopping on who is ultimately responsible for contributing to eating disorders in young women. First it was the modeling world and media. Then Gisele piped in and blamed parents. Shortly afterwards Gisele got publicly criticized for pointing fingers at parents and researchers in turn pointed their fingers straight at genetics.
Anyone else confused?
Well not to confuse you even more but new research is out from Stanford University that says fathers are the ones to blame now as well. Their findings came after noticing the lack in research on the father's role in eating disorders. Further finding that fathers are important in influencing their daughters toward bulimia, particularly fathers who were overweight and wanted to be thinner. These influences may be direct, such as criticizing the daughter's weight or shape, or indirect, by expressing their own concerns about weight and shape.
My head is spinning -- Who do you blame the most for contributing to eating disorders?

Comme des Garcons
Full Circle
Adidas
Honestly, I hate it when people keep trying to blame the world for America's problems, I mean I think the reason is teasing and low self esteem, because if girls today weren't teased and gossiped about, it wouldn't create low self esteem. Because girls with high self esteem wouldn't be so easily swayed by Media and the fashion industry.
1i blame the donuts! those donuts said some real mean things about my mom's credit score and now i have to eat them because if they are still on the shelf they will say more things and we'll never get out of this godforsaken trailer. over. and. out!
2They all work together--there's not just one source. If a girl grows up in a negative family environment where looks are constantly emphasized, then she opens a fashion magazine and sees anorexic models as ideals of beauty, and then starvation creates a chemical imbalance that makes starvation her mode...it's interdependent. Ok, enough seriousness!
3It is just what the people with the eating disorder see as beauty.
4I struggle from an eating disorder and I dont blame it on anyone. I see it as something to grow from and not something that should be blamed on others. Its how I see myself and no ones fault.
Im getting help and learning to see what really matters
I find it odd that the person inflicted isn't on there. I mean, society as a whole contributes...parents could be blamed for the way they raised the person - never "teaching them better"...the fashion industry because of the insane "standards" they set for women...but in the end, the only person who can make the decision is the person themselves. I've never known anyone inflicted, but I would think blaming other people for my disorder would make it harder to work past it.
And I definitely do not think that fathers are more to blame than mothers.
5blame yourself.
6Your own mind takes over.
7I agree with Lola, that low self esteem is DEFINITELY a big contributing factor to getting an eating disorder.
However I do think this study is interesting because I've had bulimia since I was 13 and my father, (who has never been seriously overweight), has been dieting and concerned with his appearance since I can remember. Maybe unconsciously his habits and attitudes about appearance drove my already shaky self esteem into an unhealthy place. Who knows? I guess this study really does apply to me though.
8It is absolutely everything melded into one. Someone is maybe predispositioned to be susceptible to outside influences. So this person wakes up and is feeling a little heavy because maybe they had an extra piece of cake at a friend's birthday the night before. Maybe Mom or Dad or Boyfriend or Bratty Little Brother mentions that hey, you only wear those pants when you're having fat days, what's up with that? Then maybe you see someone you have a crush on with someone you think is really thin. Follow that up with a health class talking about how overweight the country is, a junky lunch at the cafeteria, a friend who commiserates about feeling fat, and a fashion magazine showing off how "Thin Is In!!" and it's no wonder that people get so messed up about their eating habits.
9Also, studies have found that a substantial number of eating disordered persons were sexually molested/raped during their childhood/adolescence.
This is not always the case, but nevertheless there are a good number of molestation/rape victims who become eating disordered.
10kscincotta - you reiterate my point that the weakness of the person is ulitimately to blame.
"Johnny likes skinny girls" and "I ate too much cake" and all that...not fun stuff, but if that drives a person to hurt their body, then ulitmately their morals and self-worth are to blame.
11i believe it's genetic first and foremost, though environment makes a difference as well. the classic nature vs. nurture debate, and as always the answer is both.
we have an evolutionary need/want/desire to be thin and have thin people as our mates because obesity is a disease which isn't healthy and can be easily seen by just looking at a person (like acne scars on a person's face, it is easily distinguishable and is a sign of disease). thus, we have a dislike of those who aren't thin and have a dislike when we ourselves are not thin.
this evolutionary bias against obesity causes everyone in the world to be critical of those who are overweight. this then balloons into the problem we have now with people picking on others for being a fat when they really aren't and then people getting over-critical of themselves.
personally, i don't think you can teach self-esteem or model good self-esteem. so i don't think it's the parents' fault at all. it's just life. and yes of course we should try to make it better.
12Even if it is genetics you can control that.
13eating disorders come from somewhere much much deeper than the blame game could ever come up with. yah you know i wanna a lose a few pounds, but because i do not have anorexia im not going to starve myself. no matter how many tiny models i see prancing around.
eating disorders are true, legitimate MENTAL DISEASES. please realize its NO ONES FAULT. not even the people who suffer, and i do mean suffer from this disease.
14True, the person with anorexia "chooses" not to consume enough, but the so-called choice isn't exactly voluntary.
15Please get off the self-esteem bandwagon. A lot of data from the education researchers is showing that these girls have high self esteem that is based on useless criteria (unfortunately parents, the media, and school all contribute), and this inflated self-esteem (read:narcissism) is a contributing factor to the problem.
We are all to blame for this problem. It's time to reset priorities and make people earn their self-esteem again. This is what would lead to our young women and men into a mind set that helps cope with or avoid eating disorders.
16Every person with an eating disorder is set off by different things. Not everyone is alike, we are all different people, and so why shouldn't different combinations of both internal and external factors make a person who may be predisposed to an eating start on a self-destructive path. Not everyone is affected by the same things.
17It's not just one thing. There are so very few issues that are caused solely by one thing.
I'm fat. I know it. I'm dealing with it, but keep butting up against walls, and at 29 I know most are of my own making.
However, it does not help that we always celebrated by going out to eat. I grew up learning to clean my plate, always. Holidays, weddings, birthdays, anything that was celebrated was around a table piled high with food and laughter. When something bad happened, there was also food, lots of good comfort food that was warm and filling, both to the body and the soul.
As an adult, I'm learning that exercise is not a dirty word. I'm learning that I can find comfort in things outside of food, that celebrations don't have to circle around what's piled on the table to munch on.
Problem is, when I go shopping, it's easy to get depressed when my size 16-18 self can't go in most stores in the mall and find anything. What happens when I get depressed? I eat. Even knowing that it's not going to help me in the long run, I've headed for Haagen-Daaz, Auntie Anne's, or the Cookie Company.
I'm unlearning those behaviors, but it's not easy. I can't imagine being a teenager and having to deal with the girls on the O.C. or MTV as my "fashion icons". It was hard enough in the grungy days of baggy jeans and birkenstocks.
To bring it back, there are as many factors to cause eating disorders as there are girls facing them.
18Kelly, I liked your comment. I didn't even think about the other spectrum of eating disorders. Who is to blame for compulsive eating? For not getting exercise? For overeating, bad eating habits, etc.? I know exactly what you mean about all the "walls" you are hitting.
But in response to "teacher's" comment, I do not feel like I am at all to blame for anyone else's problems. Some things I feel like I should involve myself in, like helping kids - because they have no choice in their situation. But there is no way anyone could ever convince me that someone else's eating disorder is caused by me or should be fixed me.
It always comes down to the person. Obviously, if they are hurting themselves by their decisions, they probably aren't too right in the head. I've never heard that genetics could cause it and I don't see how that's really a relevant arguement. I see that more as the parental influence. Like I said, the actions are preformed by the person...maybe their parents screwed them up, but they didn't withhold the food.
And also Katie225...if you don't think self-esteem can be taught or modeled, you must not have children. The first time you ever hear your daughter, whose age is still single-digits, say "I'm fat," it will completely change that view.
19how come there's no option for "self"? sure, its easy to say that, "oh the media/my parents/friends are to blame blah blah blah", but ultimately it boils down to the self. ppl have to wake up and realise that its their responsibility, and not anyone else's.
of course there are contributing factors, as children we are molded into adults by the environment we grew up in. but does that equate into being a fault of the parents/peers? i dont think so. blaming everyone else is just an easy way out of not taking responsibility i think.
and yea, i agree butrfly4404
20Ultimately, it's the parents. They have the ability to create a good environment for their kids to thrive in, and to instill the values that create self respect, which is the prerequisite for a good self esteem and self confidence. However, a person's entire environment plays a role in whatever they become - from their home to their school, to the people they see on TV. In a perfect world, the parents could shield them from the negativity, but it takes a village.
21i've been struggling with bulimia for 6 years now. there is not one thing that "caused" the disorder, but there are a myriad of factors that absolutely contributed. my parents, as some suggested was the cause, would never ever criticize my weight but they always pushed me to excel; that is where my perfectionism comes from. if i had to say that it came from one direct source, it would probably be the girl in high school who would tease me down the halls calling me the michelin man because i had a white jacket. i've never been insulted about my looks, my intelligence, my humor, but i've always been insulted about my weight. since second grade (when the teasing started), i have had a severe complex about my weight. it is so easy for a self-conscious girl to get lost into the ideal image America sets up for young girls. is it healthy to have body types like christina aguilera? no way. is it realistic? hell no, not for most of us. and for the narcissistic comment--i WISH i had some self esteem. i cannot look into the mirror and ever have anything positive to say about myself. everyone is different and there's no way too much self esteem contributed to my disorder.
what i learned from my psychologist is that i was using the eating disorder to cope with my problems. i had some pretty severe emotional trauma and i never dealt with the emotions and the guilt that i had. it's so very easy to take things out on yourself when you can't quite analyze the situation properly. eating disorders are nothing more than a coping mechanism for a deeper problem... people deal with emotional issues differently.
if anyone does have an eating disorder, please get help for it. it IS serious. bulimia runs in my family (aunt had it--died from it, dad had it, grandmother had it, several other cousins have it) and last march, my cousin heather died at the age of 20 from bulimia complications. everyone is beautiful and it's so sad that some of us just can't seem to realize it.
sorry this post was so jumbled. it's hard to talk about eating disorders unless you've been there, and it's so easy for people outside of the situation to criticize the girls who go through them. it's really sad.
22THEMSELVES!
23I used to have a really bad eatting disorder when I was in my late teens, I got down to in the 90's and no one in my family ever said a word about it (how tiny I was think olsens) other then how I look so nice when I am thinner. I never thought anyone was to blame but I did it to shut my parents mostly my dad and grandmother up. At my most I weighed 160 which is not that bad. But my dad would (and still does) grab my stomach and say putting on weight? or will poke me and say you really want to eat that? I am 28!!!! My grandmother said to me last year when I was going to a wedding why not drop 20lbs I would look better in the photos!!!!!!!!!! She is about 160 lbs and shorter than me!!!!!!!!!
My dad is on the smallish size hes not a large man at all but how could anyone say that to their only child?
My mother had NEVER commented on my weight other than when I was very thin I looked nice like that.
I dont blame my parents. I probably should but I dont.
24I had an eating disorder as a teenager and I still continue to struggle with it to this day (almost 14 years later). I DO not place any blame with my parents. They did a wonderful job raising me (the best they could working opposite schedules) and gave me anything I needed/wanted.
I am a firm believer that genetics plays a big role in eating disorders. I know of others within my family that also had eating disorders. I'm not to say that the media, etc. isn't partly to blame and that other people's eating disorders aren't caused by home life.
But, in my opinion, I think genetics plays a big role.
25actually katie225, from an evolutionary standpoint, being thin could be an evolutionary disadvantage for women as a certain level of body fat is necessary to menstruate, sustain a pregnancy and the subsequent breastfeeding that most (non-western) societies dictate until the child is a toddler. a woman who is able to store more excess bodyfat while remaining active will also be able to survive the nutritional hardship of caring for a baby in the event of a decrease in available food resources by burning the excess stored fat. from an evolutionary standpoint then, these women will be able to endure food resource hardship, provide nutrition for their children, produce more children who will not only survive but go on to reproduce and eventually their genes would be over-represented in the gene pool.
so in other words, our early human ancestors were likely not size zeros, but probably a larger, healthier size appropriate for their level of activity and daily stress on the body.
the current obsession with extreme thinness is actually a projection of social and cultural values and standards of beauty that are pliable and ever-changing. with modern nutrition and medical innovation, the type of multi-system, multi-generational forces (thousands and millions of years of work) selecting for or against a certain bodytype are not as pressing, giving way to social and cultural rules. also our sedentary lifestyle, diets, and eating disorders such as bulimia/anorexia, amongst many other things have changed the ways in which we treat our bodies, much different from what we may have evolutionarily been "selected" to do.
it's a standard misunderstanding of how the mechanisms of evolution, sexual selection and natural selection work, mistaking the the idea that "a peacock with the prettiest plumes will win the girl peacock" with how these mechanisms actually work in both the animal and human world.
good try though.
26wow, i love the sensitivity of which this issue is handled. you guys do realize that its considered a psychological problem not unlike obsessive compulsive disorder. so is an obsessive compulsive to blame for feeling the compulsion to flip on the light ten times? the fact is that there are all kinds of situations that can cause an eating disorder, gisele bundchen got knocked for saying families were to blame for eating disorders but she had a point, girls who grow up in a positive environment are not going to put all their self worth in diet and excercise or lack therof. if a girl watches her mom only eat lettuce for two weeks each month, then guess what that girl may eat lettuce for a month straight when she feels fat. if a girl grows up with fashion magazines all around her, then that could be her standard of beauty. for those who say blame yourself, its that kind of ignorance about eating disorders, that keeps the problem going. just eat or just dont eat, to you is easy. but to someone who has this disorder, its a milestone
27flutter-the one, the only, accept no substitutions
All of the above.
28flutterpie - Alcoholism and drug abuse are also partly psychological problems that resonate from varying contributing factors....but they are the ones who take the drugs, who drink the alcohol.
I agreed that parents really do set the examples at home, but there are plenty of people who come from good families with good morals and even good eating habits and still end up with an eating disorder.
OCD is NOT like an eating disorder as it doesn't (usually, at least) harm you - there is no physical change from it. Alcoholism, eating disorders, cutting, even putting yourself in abusive relationships...all partly psychological, partly phsyical...all can only be started AND stopped by themselves. If we're looking to place blame here, that's the only real place it can go. One can not turn around and say "My mom is so bad to me, THAT'S why I use drugs, it's HER fault I smoked that crack." Is it??? Did she buy the drugs? No. Did she light 'em up for you? No. They may have made them FEEL bad, and turn to another source to let out their pain, but they most certainly did not hold them and force them to purge or starve them or give them the drugs, etc.
29bttrfly-ocd is a chemical imbalance which if left unchecked can lead to depression, withdrawal and eventually suicide. many eating disorder victims go through the same obsessive patterns (writing down every food you eat, counting calories, and how many you have burned, etc.) the fact is that there is much more to it than hey im not eating today. of course there are initial choices involved but eating disorders are affecting girls as young as 10 or 11, they think that hitting puberty is getting fat. where is that idea coming from? should young girls really be held responsible for how they perceive themselves?
30flutter-the one, the only, accept no substitutions
sorry i hate doing this: that should of said most eating disorders begin to manifest themselves as young as 10 or 11
31flutter-the one, the only, accept no substitutions
I really think it depends on the person. One of my very best friends had one, and it was awful for me. You really can't help someone unless they want it. I tried everything that I could think of. (Which I ended up gaining 10 pounds from this) Anytime that she would ask me if I wanted to go eat I would, even if I had just ate. I seriously thought that she was getting better since I would see her eat. Well later when she got better she told me that when I would go eat with her she would go home and throw it up.
32I think it is a combination of things.
For those of you who have opened up about your eating disorders, I commend you for your honesty.
33Parents & family, self, peers, industry.
34so true sticky!
35It's everything it's never black and white for anyone the problem. For me I don't eat when I am stressed out it's a control issue. I passed out one day because of it and when everyone of my friends and family watched me like hawks for days I got soo mad saying "why is everyone treating me like I have an eating disorder", when one of my friends finally said "well cause you do" It hit me I then understood how easy it is for eating disorders to take over young girls lives. Luckily, I have been arround people with the problem, been educated on it and was able to stop it before it got out of control, but alot of people are unaware of the problem.
Blame is not the cure!
36seee ! you know how ... you seee you know how ,, well im just sick of people calling me fatt
i
can see that i am a little plump but i dont see the problem
and its because of
your stupid website that had me eating and thinkinbg for weeeks :@ I HATE YOU MOTHER f*ckERS !!!!!!!!!!!!
37aaaw dont worry fatty fatty boom boom im sure you are not fat !
:( how do you think i
feel i am like a rake and people make fun of me calling me a skinny little height of sh*te ! im hate those stupid toley munchers ! love you fatty fatyy boom boom ! xxxx
38awwww
thanks skinny little cow ??;)i am a male by the way
and that little comment turned mee on
im going to name my flab after you, thank you soooo much
I LOVEEEE SKINNY PEOLPLE :)xxxxx
39aaaaw thanks youuu !
I LOVE FAAAAT PEOPLEEE !
:P:) xxxxx
40i will name my skin and bone after youu !
yous are sick
hahahah ! but i love yous !
41hellloooooooo my name is joe i dont have any problems
butt i wanted to comment
causee you see i like to type
but since i have nothing to say i would like to
comment on fatty fatty boom and skinny little cow :L yoous gys crack me upp
butt i think its sad causeeee you well made those things upp a bet that you fatty fatty boom boom aint fat sick BASTARDS
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